Saturday, January 27, 2018

How Media Controls The Narrative

It is today well established most of the media outlets in the Western world are sensationalist, driven by viewership and advertising dollars. The idea that wildfires, floods, presidential political drama and grizzly murders are far more likely to make headlines in the daily news cycle than statistics on world peace, advancement in scientific research, or ways people are making their communities better places to live isn’t even remotely surprising to us, even as many bemoan this fact. While local television news stations, small newspapers and many independent media companies are at least attempting to bring people around the world meaningful information, an increasing percentage of Americans, and Westerners as a whole, are obtaining their news fix from 24/7 media giants the likes of CNN, Fox News, and MSNBC.

Such media conglomerates not only focus on the sensational, they set the tone for entire political debates. Built for extreme events such as 9/11 or hurricane Katrina, these entities stretch their reporting when the news cycle runs thin on meaningful content. The result is a host of talk show panels and political pundits, a deep dive into the river of mundane, hyperbolic, highly partisan and hyper-sensationalist rhetoric we’re barraged with in the modern day. They give legitimacy to conspiracy theories before turning them into full witch hunts, willfully overlook blatant corruption from their ideological allies while claiming their opponents are even worse, and use every trick in the book to push their respective agendas.

From the sycophantic rants of Glenn Beck and Sean Hannity, manipulating a misinformed viewership, to the obvious bias of MSNBC, demeaning anything and everything emerging from the Trump administration as a knee-jerk reaction, these networks exist to sell us ideas. Primary media outlets, especially those in America, don’t give us important, unbiased news. They often fail to even give us less important news for the sake of viewership and advertising revenue.

Our largest, most influential media networks sell us propaganda, ideology, a dog-and-pony show to not only distract us from events and decisions which truly matter, but separate us into artificial camps from which we bite and claw at each other relentlessly. While we, the general populous are busy believing our political rivals are enemies, those truly running the show in our country are busy pushing their agendas through well-connected lobbyists and huge corporate donations to collectively strangle and clutch the balls of our government, all while telling us corruption and inefficiency within our government are the real problems.

It’s undoubtedly true there are tens of billions of tax dollars wasted, misused and unaccounted for every single year in the U.S. alone, while political bribery, apathy and self-interest dilutes the ability of even the most well-intentioned politician to make meaningful change. Bureaucracy is notoriously inefficient and lacks responsiveness to the needs or complaints of the public, and many governmental departments doing good work are severely underfunded, while others become bloated due to their political connections. Government isn’t perfect, but the media rarely discusses measures to improve its function. Instead they nearly inevitably take one of two positions on the topic: the government is too big and needs to get out of everyone’s business, or the government should become larger and do more to help the people.

The final result is we wind up in an endless cycle of interchangeable lying and scheming politicians and lobbyists, the shrinking and enlarging of various programs and departments based on who controls the government, vitriolic political debate from network pundits over details ranging from obnoxiously exaggerated to painfully untrue, and continual disillusionment and disinterest in the political process from a large and ever-growing cross-section of the voting population. All of this dysfunction is by no means an accident, nor is it unavoidable. It is a purposeful and deliberate collective control of the national narrative, and we play right along, knowingly or otherwise. There is no single puppet master holding the strings, but a collaborative and adaptive network advocating for the interests of those truly holding the reins of power at any given time.

The good news is, this dysfunction and political theater is entirely escapable. There are plenty of solid, honest journalism endeavors around America and the world. The Economist, Reuters, ProPublica, Allsides, C-SPAN, and others all provide means to pivot away from the charade and indulge in more investigative, true journalism. We also have the option to tune out, to be incredibly selective about our media input generally. Regardless of your preference, being aware of the political reality before you is key. Watch for bias in the media you consume, and at least attempt to hear various sides of a debate before fully forming your own opinion.

When you hear an argument on Fox News or MSNBC, let it register in the back of your mind this is their job, they are attempting to persuade and influence you. It is your job to become as fully informed as possible before allowing them to do so. It’s far too easy and tempting to be lumped into idealogical tribes, to see Republicans or Democrats as the enemy, but reality is far more complex and nuanced than that. The truth is, those attempting to divide us are the enemy. There are real solutions to the many problems we face, and honest discussion of our disagreements to be had. We can take our power back from the billionaire media moguls, self-interested demagogues and corrupt power brokers of today’s world. We can and will figure our issues out together, one step at a time. All it takes is changing the way we think and act. Simple enough.


Thanks for reading! This blog works in tandem with my YouTube channel of the same name. Feel free to check it out if you enjoy my content here. Come back often for regular updates, and see you next time...

YouTube channel here.

Thursday, January 18, 2018

The Importance Of Emotional Health

A tale perhaps as old as the human race, romantic relationships tend to be where the most dramatic instances of emotional upheaval and instability unfold in my life. While many of my relationships never became overly serious, or ended on amicable terms, those which went sideways at the end really seemed to go downhill quickly. One of the most notable examples, in my mind, occurred during my relationship with the only woman I've yet truly considered marrying.

Kind, intelligent, charming and beautiful with a great sense of humor, she was exciting and intoxicating beyond belief to me. She was also profoundly compromised emotionally, and really, that’s a kind way of describing the ordeal. The daughter of immigrants, she had been in several very negative relationships before meeting me, often physically and sexually violent, and emotionally abusive in nature. Her parents, while eventually becoming aware of certain aspects of this, encouraged her to keep quiet and work through the emotional trauma on her own, before sending her off to a university far from home. This, as one might imagine, was a supremely poor way for her parents to handle things.

At this far away university, she met myself. The seemingly innocent introduction occurred at a frat party hosted by guys we both knew from school. And as it turned out, she was loosely dating one of the guys in the fraternity. I didn’t possess that particular bit of information yet, and so unabashedly went about talking to and flirting with her as we drank and laughed at people more drunk than ourselves. Our conversation went well, and while my memory got a bit hazy, it’s entirely possible we made out a little bit before her kind-of-boyfriend came over to break it up and attempted to fight me. I ended up simply leaving with my friends, but I already had her phone number, and attention.

Fast forward about a month, and she was all mine. I felt like a raging badass: she made me feel masculine, strong, powerful and desired, and she repeatedly stated she felt just the right kind of pursued, feminine and sexy. So initially, our relationship went incredibly well. We were simply having fun, things were easy, and we enjoyed each other’s company. Being around each other was a much needed and appreciated escape for us both. It was relaxed and cathartic, yet things moved far more quickly than either of us expected.

By the time we had been dating for a year, we were making plans to move in together. I was even beginning to look for an engagement ring and plan out a proposal. Yet, just when our relationship seemed to be at its most promising, things began to slowly deteriorate. The emotional realities of her past began to bubble to the surface of her behavior, and rampant, copious alcohol consumption became a regular response.


Initially, I was confused, as I knew nothing of the darker parts of her past. I was under the impression she simply wasn't happy with me, but she still threw herself into our relationship. Anytime I spoke of slowing things down or taking a break, she nearly had a mental breakdown.

This carried on for months, I felt increasingly stuck and suffocated in the role of emotional support, therapist and pseudo-parental figure all rolled into one. I gradually discovered more about what she had been through: how her exes had mistreated her, how her parents reacted, how the whole thing made her feel dirty, used, unloved and worthless. I honestly tried to be there for her, physically and emotionally present. I wanted so much to help her through the pain.


Yet, despite my repeated recommendations, she refused to speak to anyone, aside from myself, about her lingering issues, and turned ever more to drinking in an effort to dull her inner demons. Before long, in drunken states, she was openly discussing committing suicide. Thus far, she hasn't followed through with such plans.

As I implied earlier, the relationship didn't last. It became far more stressful, draining, heavy, and dark than I was willing to remain in. At the end of the day, I couldn't force her to move forward in health, and refused to let myself remain in such a twisted place with her. Yet to a degree, I still feel guilty about leaving.

Our relationship was a grand production of incongruence: I loved her, and supported her, yet felt disconnected from her for the better part of a year. She loved me, I truly believe it, but she didn't seem to know how to really love herself. Her deepening alcoholism and isolation told me I wasn't very valued, yet when she was with me, she was intensely affectionate. This messed with my head to a degree I couldn’t fully appreciate until I was entirely free of the relationship.

As I told her, the best way to be authentic, happy and content in our lives is to be honest, with yourself first and foremost. Accepting and embracing who you are, every aspect of your past, moving forward in self-acceptance, self-love, and determination to not let previous experiences define you is liberating, and crucial to our mental and emotional health. Talking with someone, going to a professional, is incredibly therapeutic. It allows us to work through issues on our own terms, to talk through things we’d likely continue to mentally ignore and push down until they manifest as a larger problems in our lives.

Keeping a journal, venting to a close friend, talking to a pen-pal online, having brutally honest conversations with ourselves or a loved one who’s passed on, there are many complementary ways we can open up and remain emotionally vulnerable in a safe setting. The effects of emotional trauma and pain are real, and deserve the same sort of care and attention our common physical ailments receive. Don’t let what others have done to you, or decisions in your past, haunt and hurt you any more than they already have. We all need to be real with ourselves, and honestly analyze our lives, thoughts and feelings if we truly want to live our best life.

I hated seeing how the fucked up decisions of others, of selfish and abusive men, were causing such problems in my exes’ life. It wasn’t her fault, she can’t change her past, but she can reclaim her emotional health for the best possible version of her future. She wouldn’t do so while I was with her, but I intensely hope she eventually does. Emotional and physical health, happiness, contentment, these things don’t happen accidentally, but they can be attained with determination and honesty. Little by little, person by person, we can each discover what these concepts mean in our lives, and build a better world in the process.


Thanks for reading! This blog works in tandem with my YouTube channel of the same name. Feel free to check it out if you enjoy my content here. Come back often for regular updates, and see you next time...

YouTube channel here.

Saturday, January 13, 2018

Why California Is So Badass

Sleepy little rustic mountain towns, country roads cutting through acre after acre of corn rows, grazing lands and apple orchards, quiet lakeside villages hovering at the edge of expansive forests, chilly seaside ports covered in fog and smelling of fish and seaweed. None of these scenes likely sound at home in California, but they are. And, they’re only taken from the northern portion of the state.

From the sunny, sandy beaches in the south, to the serene forests and rolling hills of the far north, California is a gorgeous state. Striking mountain ranges, expansive desert, rugged coastline, white-sand oceanside towns stretching on for miles, giant redwood forests, and some of the most serene and productive agricultural land in the nation, California is an experience all its own. We are a country within a country, a way of life which has become synonymous with laid-back living, constant optimism and an innovative spirit to match the wild and gorgeous land we call home.

Hosting Silicon Valley and Hollywood, titans in both the technology and entertainment industries, California is so much more than Los Angeles and San Francisco. World class cities worthy of plenty of your attention, they are but the tip of an impressive and expansive iceberg of class and beauty in one of the largest and most ecologically, geographically, economically, culinarily and ethnically diverse states in the US.

Take a relaxed road trip along the 101 highway, enjoying the ocean view and salty sea air in gorgeous settings like Big Sur. Visit the stunning vistas of Yosemite National Park in our rugged Sierra Nevada mountains, surf the gorgeous sun-kissed waves of the San Diego region’s coastline, get lost four-wheeling imposing sand dunes in the Mojave before playing a round or two of golf in one of our many resort towns. From quiet fishing spots in the mountains to bustling, neon-light filled nightlife in LA, California has something for everyone.

We have our problems, undoubtedly. Our state government is heavily encumbered by special interests and voter referendums, and proves time and again to be less efficient than other states. Our taxes and cost of living are higher than average, while our regulations and strong unions tend to make starting and maintaining a business here more difficult than other places in the country. For those who identify as politically or religiously conservative, San Francisco may as well be a living nightmare of backwards values. The state government in Sacramento might be the premiere example of the failures of modern liberal ideology, and the very word California has become an adjective to describe everything seen as wrong with the Left, Democrats and Liberals in America.

Yet, as with so much else, such views are overly simplistic and only part of the equation. We have amongst the highest standards of living in the country, a highly sophisticated and diversified economy which routinely grows faster than the rest of the the US, tying Oregon for highest growth rates in 2016, for example. Strong unions fight for and protect Californian jobs and wages, our public infrastructure is expansive, generally well-maintained and forward thinking with projects like the California High Speed Rail promising to connect two of the largest metropolitan areas in America.

Our social safety net, including tax credits for business, is amongst the most robust in the country, and we possess creative, manufacturing, technology, and entertainment sectors the rest of the world stands in envy of. Our public and private universities routinely make top lists around the world, and modern signatures from the bikini to the theme park were developed or popularized in California.

We are dynamic and relentless, disruptive and always pushing our own boundaries. We are an entire state dedicated to the idea that hard work and creative solutions can benefit everyone around us, and we’ve created a society which has become synonymous with the American Dream. California is and has been one of the fastest growing and changing states, economically and demographically, for decades, and will almost certainly remain this way for years to come.

We’re not perfect by any means, but there are so many reasons why the Great State of California is known, romanticized, envied, copied, and visited by so many around the world, and home to so many in America. There are many other beautiful places to call home, but few with the variety and dynamism California presents. Despite what you may have heard, Californians are by-and-large a friendly, welcoming, accepting, open-minded people, well accustomed to visitors and those newly residing in the state.

So, if you already live here, take pride in your home. Explore it and see all it has to offer. If you’ve never been here, make plans to visit. It is beyond worth it; you will not be disappointed in the variety of food, people, experiences and sights you’ll be able to get lost in while here. I’m extremely biased, but California has a way of doing that to people, once you’re here for a while. The Golden State is a grand, sweeping epic all its own. I love this state, and truly believe you will too. Come find your own badass adventure in the Great American West. Your future self will thank you.


Thanks for reading! This blog works in tandem with my YouTube channel of the same name. Feel free to check it out if you enjoy my content here. Come back often for regular updates, and see you next time...

YouTube channel here.

Saturday, January 6, 2018

The Importance Of Being Honest With Yourself

Over three years ago now, I reconnected with an old friend of mine I hadn’t seen in almost a decade. We hit it off instantly, exactly as we had when we were younger. We had overlapping groups of friends, as we found out, and began purposely organizing parties and outings around this fact. She and I began meeting up to grab coffee or lunch every two to three weeks, and it was easy to keep platonic because both of us were in happy relationships dating other people.

A few months into our rekindled friendship, I broke up with my then-girlfriend, but my friend and I were still really getting along well and enjoying each other’s company. We began drinking more together; every so often it was just the two of us. And, things became slightly more complicated.

One night, while her boyfriend was out of town on a job, she and I decided to have a board game night and just hang out. Then, we discovered we had access to a full handle of Fireball whiskey. Next thing you know, I wake up naked next to her, sun obnoxiously bright in my hungover eyes as I piece together a scene of pillows and blankets strewn across the room.

After slightly freaking out about the fact I’d left hickies on her neck, my friend informed me she loved her boyfriend, the night before was a mistake and we should just move on as if nothing had happened. I agreed, she left in a hurry, and we left it there. At least, we left it there for a while.

A few months go by and everything is going well. We’d still hangout with the same friends, meet every so often to catch up, and hit up a bar or party with the crew on the weekends. It was a damn good time, but cracks in our plan began to show. My friend started to confide in me some of the problems she was having with her boyfriend, and telling me about fights they were having with increasing regularity. She began turning towards me when things went wrong in her life, and as one with just the slightest hint of a hero complex, I obliged her.

Friends began making jokes about how I should, “just finish stealing her already,” and her boyfriend began to ever-so-slightly ostracize me from events they hosted or organized. This irritated me, and I flatly denied any interest in her or desire to break up the relationship. Yet, this wasn’t entirely true. Even while I attempted to deceive myself and others, I was falling for her, harder than I’d ever expected. I found her dynamic and captivating, and I’m definitely one to want what I can’t have. This proved dangerous for us both.

Towards the beginning of the summer, once again while her boyfriend was out of town for work, my friend and I decided to go on a day trip to Yosemite. We had a blast, and found our way to getting some alcohol on the way up, making it even better. After a long day I convinced her to just crash at my place, and we found some more alcohol. I feel like I don’t even need to explain what else happened that night.

The next morning, however, neither of us freaked out or said it was a mistake. She didn’t hurriedly cover up hickies with makeup and leave, or even tell me she still loved her boyfriend. She stretched and woke up lazily, rolled over to face me, wrapped her arms around my neck, and softly met her lips to mine. I smiled and kissed her back, but in that moment it really hit me exactly what I was doing, what I had done, and how I was becoming the very man I always told myself I wouldn’t be.

In less than a month, and after some notable drama, my friend and her boyfriend had broken up, and she came to live with my family and I for a few months. I lost several friends in the ordeal, and it created some issues with others which linger to this day. To top it all off, my friend and I never even dated. We both acknowledged we had feelings for each other, but I was not interested in being a rebound, and she was sleeping with other men within three weeks of moving in with my family. So while I intended to give her time to work through things, in her mind she was trying to goad me into making a move, which I didn’t even know about until much later.

We got into a number of arguments over those months, and it became increasingly clear we really weren’t good for each other. We knew how to have fun together, but most of our interactions were based on our chemistry and attraction, often while under the influence anyways, and little else. In the end, neither of us got what we wanted, and by the time she moved out, we were no longer overly close. Just like that, everything which felt so intense; so real and almost destined, fell apart before our eyes. We picked up what remained of our friendship and continued on for a while, but we were both quickly in relationships with other people.

We slowly drifted apart over the next year or so, and after one final argument, I ended things entirely. With one conversation, I disconnected myself from a woman I had once tried so hard to keep in my life, and gone so far out of my way to remain close to. I had considered her one of my close friends, yet in the end I only wanted it to be over. And I didn’t regret my decision to end things at all. I felt free, and still do.

There are a number of points I hope you can take from this story. First of all, don’t be that asshole that gets between people in relationships. Don’t use friends and social events to implement this ‘getting between’ your object of affection and their significant other, and fully realize the terrible potential of alcohol in the hands of a handsome madman. Most of all, though, be real with yourself. Be honest with yourself about how you feel, where you’re at and what’s important to you. Be frank with yourself about how much various people mean to you, feelings you may have for them, and what you’re willing to lose and risk to get what you want. Be real with yourself about who you want to be, and do your best to not sink below your own standards.

I don’t regret rekindling the friendship, or developing feelings for her, nor ending the friendship years later. Yet, I would change a number of the decisions I made in between, choices which hurt other people, and I can’t take them back. So, if there’s one thing you get out of this: avoid actions which compromise who you want to be, your ideal self, to the best of your ability, and you will be well on your way towards living your best life.


Thanks for reading! This blog works in tandem with my YouTube channel of the same name. Feel free to check it out if you enjoy my content here. Come back often for regular updates, and see you next time...

YouTube channel here.

Saturday, December 23, 2017

Bullying Is Bullshit

Of all the many things wrong with humanity, perhaps the most tragic and ridiculous reality of our world is the fact children the world over have been exposed, one way or another, to the act of bullying. From going out of their way to put people down, to humiliating other kids in front of their friends, to simply mean physical acts which are very often violent, bullying is an age-old problem endemic to humanity. We are a relatively intelligent, social species, and with all the positives that brings, we’ve retained a handful of negative traits along the way.

Yet, bullying is a problem beyond the realm of children. Bosses at work are often bullies, people in positions of authority, such as law enforcement or prison guards, can be bullies just as easily. Even our current President has made a name for himself being a raging bully and deeming it “saying it like it is” to make the whole charade more palatable. The problem surrounds us and permeates our society, much like corruption and sexual harassment. And as we all know too well, even our children are infected and affected by this lunacy.

Take Keaton Jones, an 11 year old boy from Tennessee who recently made a now-viral video calling out his bullies. He gave a heartfelt reflection on how messed up this whole thing is for anyone to go through, and it’s resonated with people. Celebrities, politicians and regular people from all over expressed their support for Keaton over social media, even extending invitations to be taken out on a yacht, hangout with Snoop Dog and attend the premier of the next Avengers film. There’s even a GoFundMe campaign to help pay for his future college education.

Keaton’s video is heartbreaking, no child should have to go through such nonsense. Yet, nearly all of us have, at one point or another, faced a bully in our own lives. In my experience, even bullies themselves are driven by abuse in their own life, often in the form of their parents. For example, in middle school, I had one particular guy from the baseball team that would harass me relentlessly, calling me short, fat, stupid and ugly, often trying to knock books or other items out of my hands, and generally just excelled at being a dick. I avoided him as often as I could, and survived all the way through high school and beyond, I’m pleased to announce.

Years later, I found out the same guy committed suicide. It turns out his mother had died when he was young, and his dad was a raging alcoholic who often beat him and his siblings. Eventually, he was placed in foster care, and it then hit me that I hadn’t seen him throughout almost all of high school. And now, years later, for reasons I’m still not aware of, he took his own life. The guy that made my life far more difficult was in fact living a miserable life himself, one far worse than my own.

There is no excuse for treating other people poorly, but it can help to understand all of us have challenges and bullies in our lives, and to try to empathize, to reach out and make as many friends and allies as possible. In fact, this was exactly my anti-bully strategy in middle and high school. I was never one of the coolest kids, but I was never at the bottom of the social hierarchy either. I played sports, dated pretty girls, and am built like a human tank. So, I made friends.

I looked for others who were picked on, those who didn’t have many friends, those who were more introverted, awkward, or considered weird by most others. It didn’t always work out, but I started going out of my way to befriend them. And more often than not, it worked. We built something of a coalition of misfits, and in so doing, insulated ourselves from the effects of bullying. We’re stronger in groups, as they say, and I’m still friends with many of these unlikely allies to this day. Building a solid network of people around you is a proven system which can work for anyone.

This is often easier said than done, and the plan wasn’t always perfect, but it helped quite a lot, and it can help you as well. Whether you’re still in school or a middle-aged professional, dealing with bullies requires self-confidence, strategic thinking, and friends. Develop these skills and connections, network and build a coalition around you, and do your best to hold bad behavior accountable. For example, if you work in an office space, and your boss is a jerk, connect with others who feel the same way. Bring the issues to his or her attention, and if they refuse to cooperate or change, consider going above your boss. Contact your HR department, if you can. Either way, you’re going to have to make a move at some point, even if it means leaving your job.

It’s 20-goddamn-17. We deserve better than the behavior of our primate ancestors, we need to do better than the behavior of our ancestors. It starts with each of us: invest in your children and guide them in dealing with their own bullies. Be the parent that records their child calling out their bullies, and help them build a self-confidence and network of people to help them through difficult times in their lives. Do the same in your life, and refuse to let people, even our own President, get away with such behavior. Just like Keaton says in his video: stay strong, things will get better. And they get better through all of us taking action, and demanding a better version of humanity.


Thanks for reading! This blog works in tandem with my YouTube channel of the same name. Feel free to check it out if you enjoy my content here. Come back often for regular updates, and see you next time...

YouTube channel here.

Friday, December 22, 2017

Not Even Net Neutrality Can Survive Trump?

It’s official guys, crony capitalism is in full swing here in the U.S. We can’t even defend the internet, around which so many of our lives revolve, in this era of Trump. Lies ranging from the regulations were harming investment to they hindered the ability of emergency medical services to function effectively were told, yet all of them were lies. The FCC knows they are lies, Ajit Pai, chairman of the FCC, knows they are lies, yet they are pushing this corporate-donor agenda anyways. If anything sums up the bullshit big-business corruption running rampant in Washington D.C., made even worse during the chaos of this early Trump administration, this is it.

In an age of resurgent white nationalism, shrunken national monuments, blatant lies on everything from inauguration crowd sizes to severity of tax cuts to the physical beauty of a border wall, habitual sexual harassers being exposed left and right, reckless tweets from our own President, and a general political atmosphere based on simple answers to complex issues, perhaps nothing is sacred. Maybe we shouldn’t expect anything to be off limits or too ridiculous for Trump and his kind, but we should never accept this as normal or okay.

Corporate and special interest money has been swelling the coffers of politicians for decades, yet has become more dramatic in light of some rather recent Supreme Court Decisions. Notably with the Citizens United case in 2010, politics has become ever more influenced by those most willing and able to fund the machine. Scores of competing billionaires, millionaires, corporations, lobbyists representing dozens of industries, unions and political action committees all jockey for position and influence, very often at the expense of the average voter.

There are times our interest overlaps with those of the wealthy and elite, but we are nearly never the reason why things go our way in politics. The best we can do is form powerful lobbies, like the NRA, wether you agree with it or not, to speak on our behalf. Aside from these single-issue organizations, the nation and economy is increasingly run by and in the name of those paying for it. We are not yet a tyrannical oligarchy like Russia, or a single-party dictatorship like China, but our crony capitalists are running most of the show.

We’ve faced situations like this in the past, notably in the Gilded Age of the late 1800s, and we’ve emerged stronger, freer, and more prosperous every single time. But freedom and prosperity truly are not free. Our government is meant to be a tool of the people, a body through which our collective will can be shown. It was developed with plenty of checks and balances in the system to prevent both rule by whim of the masses, and rule by powerful yet corrupt individuals.

What our Founders could not have easily imagined, however, is how America would look today. Industrialization, automation, information technology, mass transit, dozens of multinational corporate juggernauts, the world has changed drastically since the creation of our country. Just as the branches of government provide checks and balances on each other, unions and the government represent the people when dealing with business.

We should absolutely support business, especially small and startup companies, they’re the backbone of our country, and keeping the market as free as possible has proven to be the greatest source of wealth creation and innovation. The unfortunate reality is, however, in areas where expensive infrastructure is needed, such as electricity, cell phone service and emergency medical services, there are often few options around a specific area. For example, where I live, there is no competition to Comcast in providing cable internet access, and if someone in my family suddenly had a heart attack or stroke, there are only two hospitals I can take them to.

This leads to effective strangleholds on various markets, with one or only a few companies providing a service. This allows for huge artificial manipulation of the price and quality of service, and we have seen this reality time and time again. Simply put, the free market does not work on behalf of the People in such circumstances. Yet, the government can intervene to represent our will. It can be the guaranteer of a free market and prohibit crony capitalism. Our government has done so in the past, and in the most successfully run countries on the planet, they do quite often.

This leads us back to the internet and net neutrality. The regulations put in place back in 2015 ensured a free, open and equal-access internet service for everyone. It is arguably the purest example of the government being used on behalf of the People to ensure a free market. There were dozens of utility exemptions given to the industry, from the government declining to set price limits or speed requirements to emergency medical services being allowed traffic priority. Nonetheless, it wasn’t enough. The large internet service providers want as much control over their market as possible, at the expense of the rest of us, and Ajit Pai and his FCC just handed it to them.

It is well past time for America to collectively wake up, to realize the Left versus Right political rivalry is much more showmanship displayed by a sensationalist media than reality, and it is in fact time for us to reclaim our say in matters of state, to reassert our voice in our government, to demand our Voice truly represents us again.

Every politician wants you to believe they are the one who will stand up for you and your interests, but until we curtail the influence of big money in politics and eliminate the ability of politicians to choose their voters through gerrymandering, a free internet is but one of many losses we’ll continue to sustain. It’s time to collectively grab our government by the balls and remind it who our representatives serve. We dictate the course of this nation, every vote counts if you make it, we are the masters of our collective destiny, and it’s about damn we start acting like it.

Thanks for reading! This blog works in tandem with my YouTube channel of the same name. Feel free to check it out if you enjoy my content here. Come back often for regular updates, and see you next time...


YouTube channel here.

Thursday, December 21, 2017

Disney Buying Fox! And OMG Star Wars

Just in case the Walt Disney Company didn’t own enough of our collective childhood, this week it was announced they’re moving ahead to collect a treasure trove of intellectual property and infrastructure in a buyout of a large portion of the 21st Century Fox media empire. Reportedly worth over $60 billion, the completed deal would see Fox retain their News, Business, and much of their Sports divisions, while turning everything else, from film rights to television stations like FX, over to the House of Mouse.

This would leave Disney in ownership of franchises like X-Men, the Fantastic Four and James Cameron’s Avatar, a larger stake in the streaming service Hulu, in addition to much else. The Marvel Cinematic Universe would expand notably almost overnight, and Disney would see its film and television presence grow dramatically while coopting one of its primary competitors. It would also leave the Murdoch family, who own and operate Fox, the second largest shareholders in the Walt Disney Company.

The whole thing still needs to be approved by regulators in a number of countries, but is expected to be allowed due to how the deal was structured. From Pixar to Marvel to LucasFilm and now Fox, Disney and its CEO Bob Iger, are on a bona fide roll. In an age of Netflix and Hulu, Spotify and MoviePass, traditional media companies are scrambling to adapt and consolidate. Disney is a prime example, acting more like a technology company akin to Google or Facebook while scooping up companies with valuable intellectual property. They even announced a plan to launch a streaming video service as a direct competitor to Netflix. As they well know, content is king.

Speaking of content, none is grabbing more public attention at the moment than Star Wars: The Last Jedi. With a current 93% positive rating on Rotten Tomatoes, and pulling in an estimated $220 million over it’s opening weekend, director Rian Johnson helmed what is already becoming widely regarded as one of the best films in the franchise, and I entirely agree.

Challenging long-held tropes while honoring the best of Star Wars tradition, Johnson upends many of the expected moves for the film in favor of giving fans what may well be the most daring and forward-feeling in the canon since Empire Strikes Back. From the very start its pace is riveting and well handled. Constantly raising the stakes, giving answers many did not expect, and even eliminating characters most presumed would be present until at least the end of this new trilogy, The Last Jedi proves itself to be one of the funniest and most heartfelt films in the franchise, while carrying a weight and dark overtone worthy of the very best the saga has to offer.

From the strong performances by its lead actors to the strikingly new-yet-familiar visual treats, served one after another, this film sets itself apart as a Star Wars movie not only honoring its past, but moving boldly into its future. Disney has made it clear they wish to take the franchise in some new directions, and after the well-done yet formulaic Force Awakens, The Last Jedi is a nearly ideal follow up. Certain fans have been notably displeased by this second act of the trilogy, but this Star Wars is a new beast, rooted in its past yet not tied to the tales of the Old Republic, Empire and Skywalkers. There’s a much larger galaxy out there, waiting to be shown to us, and The Last Jedi revels in displaying just how much fun this wider world can be.


Thanks for reading! This blog works in tandem with my YouTube channel of the same name. Feel free to check it out if you enjoy my content here. Come back often for regular updates, and see you next time...

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Thursday, December 7, 2017

Can You Even Find Your Soulmate?


Most of us still love the idea of ending up with the one person perfect for us, 'the One' or our soulmate. Whether divinely prepared or just a beautiful cosmic coincidence, we’ve been raised from a young age to look for that one individual who will leave us feeling fulfilled, and stay with us 'until death do we part'.

Reality is, there are many people who could be good for us, and likely no one truly perfect for us. As humans, we’re constantly changing, and will continue to our entire lives. We need to actively be complete, fully functional people, content in ourselves, in order to become truly fulfilled in a relationship which lasts a lifetime.

Be independent and be selective, your time and attention is valuable, so act like it. Invest in those you want to spend time with, and require the same from others. If someone regularly doesn't text you back, or sends you one-word answers with any kind of consistency, don't be afraid to ditch them asap.

Develop your own hobbies, interests, goals, skills, career and life as a whole. Not only is it sexy to meet and date people who are confident and actively living life on their terms, it prevents you from slowing down and overly changing yourself for other people.

A relationship should be a melding together of two people and their lives, but not to the extent of giving up your life completely. Relationships involve sacrifice, but make sure they’re even and don’t require you to give up anything you’re not comfortable leaving behind you. You're part of a team, a unit, and both parties should treat the relationship as such.

Keep friends and family close. No romantic partner can or should be expected to fulfill all of your needs emotionally or socially. It takes a village, and always has. Stay connected, spend time with other loved ones, and if your significant other (SO) has a problem with this, it may well be a sign it’s time for you to 'exit stage left.'

Give the relationship time and go through the seasons, so to speak. Deep relationships are built over time, and involve really getting to know each other. Don’t rush things or exaggerate every problem you have, life is a marathon. At the same time, avoid settling and relying on emotional attachment to make your decision to leave or stay. Comfort in a relationship doesn’t inherently equal happiness and compatibility.

To recap, learn to love yourself first and foremost. Don’t be afraid to leave and avoid rushing into any decision of this importance. Stay independent and selective, and demand respect from others seeking your time. Develop your own life, and only slowly integrate your SO into it. Stay socially connected and have a life outside of your relationship, isolation is risky on several fronts. And, give it time, let things develop slowly and enjoy the ride.

Finally, if and when you find someone you love, go all in. Really go for it, don't be afraid to be passionate about your life together. We all only have one life to live, and we should fill it with as much excitement, happiness, love and fun as possible. The world is more than cold enough to give you plenty of negatives along the way, so give yourself permission to be happy and love your life. Adore the person you choose, wholeheartedly and with reckless abandon when you finally create a deep, meaningful relationship. Carve out for yourselves the sort of soulmate connection you typically only read about or see in the movies.

Thanks for reading! This blog works in tandem with my YouTube channel of the same name. Feel free to check it out if you enjoy my content here. Come back often for regular updates, and see you next time...

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10 Tips To Turn Any Woman On

10. Be Extra Stingy With Your Money - Women love a guy that knows how to save and take her out on a budget. Why take her to a fancy restaurant when McDonalds has a $1 menu? She’ll thank you for it later…

9. Watch Porn With Your Girl, And Then Tell Her You Expect The Same Performance - Every woman loves to be her man’s pornstar, so give her a few pointers, and by pointers I mean tell her exactly what you expect her to do. Women love a man that takes charge…

8. Be A Man-Child/Mamma’s Boy - Women love a man that’s close with his mother, especially when he goes crying to her every single time something goes wrong. Argument? Mom. Tough day at work? Mom. Upset stomach? Mom. Your woman will be driven wild…

7. Be A Socially-Averse Lone Wolf Type - Women adore men that keep to themselves and have no friends, and better yet men that are awkward around other people. Because a man that doesn’t like people screams self-confident. Plus, he’s obviously, totally not a serial killer…

6. Brag Like Crazy - Women dig confident dudes, and what is more confident than bragging about every single positive achievement or quality you have? Nothing, absolutely nothing. So, brag away, talk only about yourself as often as possible, and never ask how your girl’s day was. That would just be too caring…

5. Give External Compliments Often And Exclusively - Women love being told their ass looks great in those jeans 273 times in a single night out. They can’t get enough of men talking about their tits and how slutty, er cute, her outfit is. Keep it sexual and constant, and she’ll love you forever…

4. Open Up About Yourself Way Faster Than Other Men - Women love an open, honest guy, one that can talk about himself and his goals all through the night. So, take it to the next level, and get super personal, and even talk about how the two of your babies might look. The earlier into the relationship you talk about marriage and kids, the better…

3. Talk about all of your exes on the regs, and be sure to call every single one of them a crazy bitch at least once per outing with your girl. It’ll make sure she feels super special and distinct from the others, with no way she’ll end up on the CB list as well…

2. Be Crass AF During Meals - Dinner with the parents? Act like a child at the table, licking your plate and belching loudly when the urge arises. Women love a man that is 100% his authentic self at all times….

1. Intimate Massage Time - Give her a well-deserved full-nude massage after all that sexy time listening to you go on about yourself, your mom and your crazy exes. Make loads of sexual quips, ask lots of dumb questions to keep her attention, and when the time is right, slip a surprise finger in her butthole. She’ll want a wedding on the spot…

*P.S. Seriously though, don't do any of this...

Thanks for reading! This blog works in tandem with my YouTube channel of the same name. Feel free to check it out if you enjoy my content here. Come back often for regular updates, and see you next time...

YouTube channel here.

Tuesday, December 5, 2017

When Should You End A Relationship?

I have a friend that until recently was miserable in her relationship. Her boyfriend wasn’t physically abusive, but he was emotionally unavailable, only saw her once a week for a few hours, ran up debt on her credit cards without paying them off, and had cheated on her at least once. The relationship had lasted 7 damn years!

To me it was obvious the relationship should be over, and she needed to get out. But, she was so attached and committed to making things work, it took her months to slowly come around to ending the whole thing. She and I had many conversations about healthy relationships and when it's time to pull the plug, even if you still love the person you're with. This post details several of the concepts we discussed.

First off, if there is any kind of abuse, emotional or physical, get out. There is no reason to stay in that state at all. You are worth far more than letting yourself be mistreated.

Next, what in life is important to you? What are top priorities in your life now, and what goals do you have in the future? What sort of lifestyle do you want to live, and where? Do you want kids? Are you career oriented, or is money not as important as the journey and experiences along the way? Are you looking for a power-couple partner or someone to have fun with? Maybe both? Are you religious, and how important is that to you in a partner? What hobbies do you have, and how integral are they to your life? Are you political, and is being with someone similar in thought to you important? Do you get along with each other’s families?

Ask questions, and be open about what you want out of life and relationships. Start to identify traits in significant others that are important to you, and begin actively looking for those.

Do you see ‘red flags’ in the relationship? Do you both have similar goals and values in life? Be brutally honest with yourself every step of the way about what you like about this person, and what you aren’t sure about. It’s not about nitpicking, it’s about learning what’s important to you, the sort of people you get along well with, and making sure you have a compatible partner before committing for, ideally, the rest of your life.

Emotions will fade over time, as the honeymoon phase wears off, so give things time and go through the seasons. Work for the relationship you want with someone willing to put the time and effort into making it work with you as well. Arguing isn’t inherently a problem, it’s how you resolve it that’s the main issue.

Simply becoming comfortable in a relationship isn’t, on its own, a good reason to stay either. After putting in the time to get to know someone, be willing to walk away if you don’t see yourself marrying them. Be honest with yourself and your partner every step of the way, and you’ll figure it out every time. Communication and general honesty is key.
On the flip side, if you find yourself really falling for someone, and they for you, don't be afraid to do everything you possibly can to work it out. Love and relationships are just as much about effort and being willing to compromise and resolve conflict as they are about compatibility. Don't give up on those you love, but don't stay if it isn't what you want. Often, only in time will you discover where you truly stand.

To recap, never accept abuse of any kind. Find out what traits, goals and values are important to you, and date people that match those. Talk and ask questions, really get to know the other person and avoid just getting wrapped up in the emotion of it all. Be picky and don’t settle, you’re talking about spending the rest of your life with this person. Go through the seasons, don’t be alarmed by calming emotions as time goes on, and do your best to truly resolve conflict and move forward. Be honest with yourself and your partner every step of the way, and you are well on your way to having a healthy, stable relationship with the love of your life.

Thanks for reading! This blog works in tandem with my YouTube channel of the same name. Feel free to check it out if you enjoy my content here. Come back often for regular updates, and see you next time...


YouTube channel here.

How To Work Out Any Problem In Relationships

So we all have that friend that is constant drama. We at the very least know of such people, even if we avoid them. They always seem to be in one argument or another with their boy or girlfriend, and generally bring drama everywhere they go. Hell, you might even be that person in your group of friends.

I’ve had several friends like this over the years, and one of my best friends since childhood, alongside her list of boyfriends, has been ruining parties and game nights and bar hopping evenings for everyone around more times than I care to count. Today, I want to talk about how you can avoid these people, prevent or stop yourself from being that person, and escape the types of relationships that consistently go down in flames.

There's no doubt it takes ‘two to tango' in a relationship, you can be incredibly calm and mature and still have a terrible go of it all. Knowing when to leave can be key, but for now we'll focus on more steady relationships. Presuming things with your significant other are fairly normal, refrain from using absolutes. 'Always' and 'never' are dangerous, and leave your partner feeling unappreciated. Instead, say things like “you rarely do this” or “you often forget to do this,” and offer a solution afterwards instead of blanket blame.

Avoid personal insulting and venting, it inhibits solutions to your problems from being introduced and earnestly discussed. Instead, present the problem at hand as plainly as possible and explain why you need things to change and how much it frustrates you. Be honest with your partner about your frustration while also acknowledging what they do right or correctly, what you love about them or how much better things have gotten.

Don’t drop the issue to avoid confrontation, and don’t steamroll your partner to end the argument on your terms. Listen to your partner’s perspective, and do your best to compromise and reach a resolution, yet be unapologetic about your own views and feelings. This involves a give-and-take strategy, and when both parties are on the same page, can and will produce beautiful results.

Additionally, don’t simply state what angers you or what you want changed before walking away like everything is fine. Sarcastically saying something akin to, "It's fine, do whatever you want," in a clearly upset manner helps nothing, and results in a greater break in communication that will only be amended upon openly talking about the issue calmly. There are times simply acknowledging a problem exists will be therapeutic, then letting things calm down before discussing a good idea, but don't let that time become a long-term event which results in kicking the proverbial can down the road.

Have boundaries each party must respect. These can be as obvious as not hitting each other, to avoiding talking about each other’s family members except when necessary. Make it work for your relationship, and stick with them. Openly discuss emotional triggers, phrases or actions which really get under your skin, when you argue so the two of you can avoid falling into the same explosive arguments time and again. It really cannot be said enough: communication is key.

To recap, avoid absolutes, insulting and venting. Be honest and fair to your partner’s positive traits, yet don’t drop the issue to avoid it nor steamroll as a petty attempt to win. Avoid simply saying what angers you before dropping it and declaring yourself fine, instead wait for a response and explain yourself as fully as you need to. And finally, set up reasonable boundaries both of you are clear about. Don’t be afraid to adjust any of these elements as time goes on, and don’t beat yourself or your partner up for not being perfect in conflict resolution.

Put these concepts into effect, and watch your relationships reach a whole new level of fulfillment. Best of luck!

Thanks for reading! This blog works in tandem with my YouTube channel of the same name. Feel free to check it out if you enjoy my content here. Come back often for regular updates, and see you next time...


YouTube channel here.

American Dream: Do Immigrants Threaten Our Way Of Life?

Welcome back! Today I want to talk about the American Dream, the average American, and what that has meant in our history. We’ve all heard the phrase, ‘A Nation of Immigrants’ as a common description of the United States, but rarely bother thinking about what new arrivals to our shores went through and continue to face.

From the Dutch and British founding small colonial outposts on the Atlantic coast of North America, to waves of German, Irish, Scandinavian, Chinese, Italian, Jewish, Polish and other immigrants fleeing hunger and persecution in the late 1800s, to the waves of Asian, Latin American and Eastern European migrants we’ve embraced since the 1960s, looking to escape oppressive regimes or create a new life for their families, America has so often represented freedom, hope, and the promise of a brighter future.

Nonetheless, as much as we welcome, “Your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,” as our Statue of Liberty proudly proclaims, we are a nation of immigrants that distrust, fear, and sometimes openly hate, every new wave of immigrants.

Our Founding Fathers were concerned about Anglicizing the ‘new’ German and French arrivals before they converted the English settlers to Catholicism. The Irish and Italians faced vitriolic hatred and violence upon arriving en masse to our shores. That’s not even mentioning the existence of legalized enslavement of fellow humans, or the continuous and persistent discrimination black, hispanic and Asian Americans have experienced throughout our history.

In spite of it all, every single nationality and ethnicity absorbed has persevered and contributed greatly to this country. Every people group has left a mark on our history, giving us new inventions and innovations, philosophy, scientific advancements, literature, music and food quintessential to the American experience today. Once distrusted and ridiculed, they are now an integrated part of the American mainstream.

And so it will be with every group after them. Be they Syrian refugees, a family fleeing Venezuela, or a college educated programer from India, America still strives to represent the best aspects of humanity. We’ve often failed to measure up to these values, and forget what our own ancestors went through to build a life here, but America has become one of the greatest nations on Earth for reasons beyond geography, religion or our form of government.

We are and will continue to be great because we embrace, “The wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me, I lift my lamp beside the golden door.”

Thanks for reading! This blog works in tandem with my YouTube channel of the same name. Feel free to check it out if you enjoy my content here. Come back often for regular updates, and see you next time...


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Monday, December 4, 2017

How You Can Feel More Manly In Today's World

Welcome back. I'd like to start this off with a story. So, I have a friend whom I was meeting for lunch the other day. When I got to his place, his wife answered the door and told me my buddy was in the back room. As I approach, I walk in on him having a tea party with his four year old daughter, pinky extended with a comically undersized English hat and all. It was hilarious, with his tattooed arms and thick beard, but his reaction was the best part: he was calm, just looked at me with a big smile and said, “Ready to go?”

That was it! The guy was doing one of the least stereotypically masculine things one can imagine, yet I left there with the distinct impression this guy is a raging badass. And that, my friends, is the key to masculinity. Confidence, calm, collected, don’t-give-a-damn confidence.

Focus on what’s important to you, whether it be honing your strengths, improving your weaknesses, or a combo of both. Don’t be afraid to be a nerd or a gym-rat, and if you lean more one way than another, don’t be afraid to try something new.

Becoming a well-rounded person inherently improves your confidence, and with it, you will build a virtuous cycle of you accomplishing more, feeling more confident, and so on. Manliness comes from action, from doing that which defines you as a man.

Whether that be curling dumbbells or writing code, running a marathon or drawing superheroes, do it, work at it, set goals for yourself, and slowly get one accomplishment after another under your belt.
And crucially, being and feeling like a man means giving yourself permission to not overly care about what others think of you. We’re all going to be aware and conscious of how other’s respond to us, but don’t let it define you. You define your masculinity.
I’m a cop, have tattoos, work out regularly, have a loaded gun on or near me pretty much all the time, and tend to be considered a pretty masculine guy. Yet, I unapologetically love Disney movies, legitimately enjoy long walks on the beach, and will usually choose sweet and fruity alcoholic drinks if able. I am one of the nerdiest cops you will ever meet, and when my ex girlfriend finally got me to watch The Notebook with her, I teared up at the end. “I think our love can do anything we want it to.” It hits you in the feels!

And the best part is, I still feel manly as hell! Because the essence of masculinity is pursuing a life of passion, of loving deeply and chasing long-shot goals, staying light-hearted and never letting life stop you. Being a man is having cuddle-on-the-couch movie nights with your girl just as much as a night out with the guys. It’s taking time to invest in yourself, having friends and family you’d do anything for. Being a man is having an amazing, hat-wearing tea party with your four year old daughter. And, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

Thanks for reading! This blog works in tandem with my YouTube channel of the same name. Feel free to check it out if you enjoy my content here. Come back often for regular updates, and see you next time...


YouTube channel here.

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